Thursday, March 26, 2009

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Words of Wisdom and Quotes from Conan


When all else fails....you always have delusion!
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And if you can laugh at yourself, loud and hard, every time you fall....people will think you are drunk!
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If life gives you lemons, make some kind of fruity juice.
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Conan O'Brien: You shot the Easter Bunny!
Will Ferrell: He made a menacing gesture at me!
Conan O'Brien: I think he was trying to give you an egg!
Will Ferrell: Why is the Easter Bunny even here, Conan? It's not Easter!
Conan O'Brien: I don't know, he just likes to hang around the studio sometimes!
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Have you ever had Fruity Pebbles? Once that stuff hits milk, it turns into a narcotic!
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People of Quebec: I am an albino jackass.
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If the C-man's not happy, show don't go down!

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Control Room



This has got to be the most important and eye-opening documentary I have seen. It's about the war in Iraq through the eyes of Samir Khader, a senior producer for Al Jazeera, Hassan Ibrahim, Al Jazeera journalist, and Lieutenant Josh Rushing, a press officer from US Central Command, among others.

It is absolutely heart-breaking. There's a point where former Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld speaks out against the US dead and captives soldiers shown on Iraqi television, arguing that this goes against the Geneva Convention and Hassan scoffs at this and pretty much says "'Now there's a Geneva Convention? What about Guantanamo bay? What about invading and bombing a country without authorization of the UN? All of a sudden there's a Geneva Convention?"

This is terribly sad, because it's true. I think that's the part of the documentary that touched me the most. The Third Geneva Convention apparently does not apply to the POW's captured by US troops. The fact that a government can torture and hold prisoners without a trial because of terminology it's beyond distressing.

There are aspects about the war that Americans need to see through the eyes of the people whose country we invaded. These are some of my notes(I'm paraphrasing):

"American news reports said troops took over the Bridge on Tigris river but Iraqi newscaster is talking to his reporters and says the only bridge that leads to Tigris is El kut. Then the troops say they are on their way to El kut. Then one of the Iraqi journalists asks: 'Is this American news all nonsense then?'"

"Hassan - 'The US is the most powerful nation on earth, yes we know, but the rest of the world is not castrated. people are resisting, people matter
Eventually they’ll have to find a solution that doesn't include bombing people into submission.'"

"Hassan - 'The Americans will defeat the Americans. I have ultimate faith in the American Constitution . . . You are the most powerful nation on Earth. You can crush everybody, yes, we know this, but don’t ask us to love it as well."

"Rushing – it’s our responsibility to reach out and understand their perspective and viceversa."

"Samir - There will be one single thing that will be left: victory, and that's it. People like victory, they don't like justifications. You don't have to justify it, once you are victorious, that's it."

To this date, the death of Al Jazeera Journalist, Tariq Ayoub, after American airplanes bombed the News Channel office in Baghdad has not being investigated. Lt. Rushing begins showing the same nationalism Iraqi people show to their country, but you see he genuinely tries to see the other side's perspective. Want to hear something ironic? After the Pentagon ordered him not to comment on the movie, he left the Marine Corps and is now working for Al Jazeera English.

I have got to get my hands on his book.

Friday, March 20, 2009

To Have An Afro Like That...



In this life I've seen everything I can see woman,
I've seen lovers flying through the air hand in hand
I've seen babies dancing in the midnight sun,
And I've seen dreams that came from the heavenly skies above
I've seen old men crying at their own grave site
And I've seen pigs all sitting watching, picture slides
But I never seen nothing like you

Do ya do ya want my love, woman
Do ya do ya want my face, I need it
Do ya do ya want my mind, I'm sayin'
Do ya do ya want my love

Well I, heard the crowd singin' out of tune,
As they, sat and sang Auld Lang Syne by the light of the moon
I heard the preachers bangin' on the drums,
And I heard the police playin' with their guns
But I never heard nothin' like you

In the country where the sky touches down
On the field, she lay her down to restIn the morning sun,
They come a 'runnin' just to get a look, just to
Feel, to touch her long black hair they don't give a damn

Well I think you know what I'm trying to say to you woman,
That is I'd like to save you for a rainy day,
I've seen enough of the world to know,
That I've got to get it all to get it all to grow

Do ya do ya want my love, c'mon now
Do ya do ya want my face, I need it
Do ya do ya want my mind, alright now
Do ya do ya want my love, ahhhhm look out!
Do ya do ya want my love,
Do ya do ya want my love?

Do ya



[In this life I've seen everything I can see woman]

Ever since the accident, the AC in my car is not working. So I've been forced to drive in the heat with the windows rolled down . . . and I'm damn happy the AC is not working. Now here's my idea of good drive: Windows down, music up, hot sunny day (sunny? I know, I'm surprised too), good pair of sunglasses to shield you from the sun, and a good, empty road.

[But I never seen nothing like you]

So I'm driving home from school, it's freakin hot, the freeway is jammed as always, and I'm still thinking about how to outsmart the smartass who happens to be smart and an ass. I stop to get my beefy double cheese burrito and I decide to take the street instead of getting into the freeway again.

[Do ya do ya want my love, woman?]

Best decision I could have made. I'm doing about 60 on the road and there's basically two ways to get to my house. You can take the freeway and exit on Indian Truck trail and pass by the suburbs, or you could take the longer route, which is basically a long, lonely road that looks like you are driving through the middle of nowhere . . . I love it.

[As they, sat and sang auld lang syne by the light of the moon]

And thus, I find myself driving through the long lonely road when ELO's "Do ya" starts playing. Which, with the exception of BB King and Eric Clapton's "Driving with the King," is the best road trip song.

[Well I think you know what I'm trying to say woman, That is I'd like to save you for a rainy day]

And I finally get home, happy and content, with the crazy idea of getting into the car again and paying the smartass a visit, using that as an excuse to drive again . . . and that's exactly what I did . . .

[Do ya do ya want my love, c'mon now!
Do ya do ya want my face, I need it
Do ya do ya want my mind, alright now
Do ya do ya want my love, ahhhhm look out!]

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Happy St. Patrick's Day!



O.K., so, I'm not Irish, but Conan is. So I felt obligated to celebrate this holiday to certain extent. Also, I'm not a drinker, but Conan is . . . Case in point:



Given these circumstances, I found myself obligated to do something to rectify this situation. I had planned to do something special for St. Patty's day in honor of Conan . . . but I woke up this morning (obviously) and after crying "5 more minutes!" for what seemed to be an eternity, I completely forgot about it and went off to work NOT WEARING GREEN!

Then, I had the audacity to tell people who asked me why wasn't I wearing green that I wasn't Irish, in case they hadn't noticed, so why the hell would I celebrate St. Patty's day. Then all of a sudden in hit me: Conan is of Irish descent! Surely celebrating this holiday must bring me closer to him (I'm not normal, so stop looking surprised, don't expect normalcy from me). But then life happened, and people happened, and work happened, and stupid guys happened, and I'm now home doing nothing for St. Patty's day because I gotta study for a midterm. Sigh, I have let him down.

The only thing that makes me feel better is that I did receive my punishment for not wearing green. I was pinched in the arm by this guy who has a bullring piercing that hurts me in the nose every time I see him. Ouch! Ouch! Ouch! He had the four leaf clover pin and everything! And he has the coolest Versace glasses that only a guy with a bullring piercing can pull off.

So even though I didn't celebrate St. Patrick's day but getting hammered from morning to noon, as some do, I did remember Conan and I did get my pinch, so there! Happy St. Patty's day to me!

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Conversations with mom



[Are we human? Or are we dancer?]

Me: Hello?

Mom: That blind guy you like is singing on TV.

Me: What blind guy?

Mom: That blind guy you like . . . the italian one.

Me: OhMyGosh, Andrea Bocelli!!!

Mom: Yeah! What's his name?

Me: Andrea Bocelli!

Mom: Yeah! Him.

Me: Thanks!

[Click]

Heath Ledger



"10 things I hate about you" is on TV. Sadness :(

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Color me freakin surprised...



Girl likes guy

Guy likes girl

Girl falls for guy

Guy just wants to get some

Girl gets her heart broken

Guy walks away with a smile

Seriously? Seriously? This still happens? I don't who I want to kick in the face, the guy or the girl. Mind you, this was all over a period of 2 1/2 months.

Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them.
-Bill Maher

"Step right over here please..."



Last Thursday, as I was going through the motions of getting checked in at LAX, I noticed a very curious addition: A TSA Backscatter, better known as a Body Imaging X-Ray Machine.

I had heard it was being installed at major airports, but I never gave it a second thought until Thursday, when there was a chance I could go through it.

Supposedly the picture above is what they'll see. Supposedly the images will never be saved. Supposedly the person looking at the images will never see your face. Supposedly, can something that will never be seen, exist at all? And yet all I can think of is "what if." And with that "what if" comes a "who cares?" I certainly don't. Even if the image was saved and displayed all over the world, it would be impossible to recognize the face. As long as it's not saved under your name! Haha! Whatevers, if this will help catch the bad guys, whomever they may be, I don't care. But with that comes the issue of scanning kids. Now, would that be considered kiddie porn? Although, there's really no issue at all, come to think of it. You can always ask to be patted down instead of going through the machine. So there! No issue at all.

Jim Cramer vs John Stewart



I can't believe it took someone from Comerdy Central to tell Santelli to shove it. I'm a huge fan of Joel Stein's, columnist for TIME magazine and Los Angeles Times, and even he said that homeowners don't deserve bailout money because they made wrong investments. That was it, in a nutshell. Ok, well, why don't we apply that logic to all the banks and auto companies that bit off more than they could chew? Risky, short-term investments got them where they are at and now we must bail them out. They get to be rescued in this turmoil and homeowners don't?

Now, I love Jim Cramer, I love him to death. I remember him saying once that gas prices were not going to keep increasing while everybody else and their mothers said it would go all the way up to $5 or $10 per gallon, and guess what . . . They stopped increasing after that. People call his show all the time asking whether they should buy or sell and as far as I can tell, and I'm not an economist by any means, the man knows his stuff. Ask him about a stock, any stock, he knows it. That's what so sad about it. Had I been able to invest, I would have followed Jim Cramer's advice blindly. I would have trusted this man with my money. He has had bad calls in the last couple of months and you can argue that the man doesn't know it all, but he knows a lot . . . He knows better than that. He should've seen it coming, the whole media should have seen it coming. They failed and now we pay the price.

I don't know if Jim was incredibly courageous, incredibly naive, or incredibly stupid to try go on Stewart's show, but he did. And as expected, John ripped him a new one. I mean, he really did his homework. But I appreciate Jim for being as humble as he was and accepting he and the network could've done better. I just hope he means it. Stewart truly, really put himself in the people's shoes and spoke for all of us. He's got our backs, but how sad is it that someone from Comedy Central's got out backs? It wasn't any of the networks that boasts of having the most reliable financial information. They can't have our backs because, they are in bed with Wall Street. Let's bail Ford and GM out. Let's bail AIG out so their CEO's can get their hefty bonuses. Let's bail J.P. Morgan Chase out. But God forbid homeowners get a piece of the pie! A pie that we paid for!

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Call me a rebel...because this girl right here lives outside the law...



After many years (only 2) of paying hundreds of dollars (only $180) for songs on itunes, I finally decided to join the masses and stick it to the man. I'm getting my songs for free. FREE! It all happened when my computer decided to quit that bitch, as Michael K would say, and crashed... And then crash again... and again. Now that is finally up and running I feel like I have to get all the songs that I paid for back. And that's what I am doing. Plus, does Bob Dylan really need my 99 cents?

Disclaimer: I'm just kidding!! I still pay for my music...*crickets*crickets*

Somebody asked me today "Who the heck is in love with Richard Roeper?" Seriously? Who? Who? Now, I wouldn't say I am "in looooove." I am slightly obsessed, that's all. I mean, it's not like I have him in my google alerts... Seriously, I don't. Really, I'm serious, I don't expect an email everyday with information about what he's been up to... I don't pray everyday that he gets a new TV show again so I can hear him say "That movie just sucked!"